In a tweet released on January 25th, Simp Fried Rice posted (beautifully) that “TSA can see your cock and balls whenever you walk through the X-Ray scanner”
This tweet was a revelation to most who saw it ((3.4K Retweets and 1,025 Replies) Great Ratio)
Everyone should be familiar with the standing x-ray machine featured in the airtight TSA security protocol. You step inside what looks like an enlarged version of one of those tube capsules that your mom would use at the bank drive-thru, place your feet on two yellow outlines caked onto what feels like a used gym mat, then you raise your arms above your head and let the TSA capture ghost-like images of your balls, batty, and dick. This keeps America safe.
My one question is this: How do I cop this pic?
Not saying that I’m packing massive heat before I leak my TSA ghost dick pic, but I think that it would be nice to see what Glenn, the 39 year old “Terminal Security Enforcer” sees when he looks at my scan.
Please TSA. Just release an option (similar to the gift shop after riding a roller coaster) where I can see/purchase my picture for a reasonable price of like $9.99. All proceeds can go towards investing in new security measures that will somehow invade more of the human body. How far can we go with this technology?
Can TSA invent a machine that scans for both bomb residue while also scanning the inside of your colon, replacing the timely/costly procedure of a traditional colonoscopy? Who knows?
I think all of these ideas would turn around such a negative facing program into a semi-fun nightmare that results in embarrassment for THOSE guys who have something to worry about in the ghost dick department.
Henlo Lizard 